got through my work today…all fine and dandy for the most part…

but something that keeps perking my attention and thoughts is a meeting we had last time or the time before. one of our newest guys was asking why he wasn’t on another meeting with our boss. then it became why is it not his way. yada yada. but it wasn’t odd until everyone wanted to brush it off as some form of “aggressive cooperation and building”. I forget the exact term that was utilized but…at what point do you put glitter on shit thinking it turns it into gold? concerning is an underestimate to that whole ordeal…let alone the dipshit who can’t use something he was supposed to know front and back.

regardless, I’m trying my best here to make any backups come to life that I can. content creation (no not onlyfans), projects becoming subscriptions (the good kinds that work), things of that nature. finding my balance once again. luckily it doesn’t seem I’m going to one of those cities again for work anytime soon too, so no clubs to worry about…but that is something that needs to be addressed and fixed sooner then later.

and as for my relationships, the love I seek…not much has gone on there. distancing myself from getting close to people and making mistakes, to distracting myself so I don’t focus on the pain that comes when i have thoughts about kaizen with someone else or deerboi doing…bullshit I’ve done…

slow day, but better this then dealing with half of my shit right now…