i was doing mostly fine for today. emphasis on the was. part of it has been the degradation of my motivation and interest in things to do. now, it’s motivated me to get my ass in gear and get some project shit done, but it scares me to gain the intelligence that may come with… Read More

putting this in notes only because i think its something important to add but also seems repetitive. dont know. it appears that today i cannot function at all, period. i’m thinking about all three of them. her, kaizen, and deerboi. and others. others ive hurt. others ive had hookups with. others that thought i was… Read More

my days go on and it seems my lust goes unchecked. every day for some reason becomes a struggle and i still have yet to learn how to control this one little bit about me. this one bit that has led to so many fucking issues. so many fucking problems with control, with being a… Read More